Update

Sorry for not writing for a while but there isn't much to write about when you're an unemployed bum with no money! So I called Lubavitch today and they told me they are looking for a person with a little more painting experience then me. How much experience do you need to paint! And I have another lead potentially working at the office at Beth El part time. Well at least Ed will keep me entertained for the next three days. He's staying at my house.

Side Rants

-I got my laptop! All I can say is thank the lord for stupid neighbors with unprotected wireless networks. Now I can stop bugging my dad about getting DSL.

-I miss my cell phone from Israel! And I'm not getting one here until I have a job so I can pay for it.

-Sorry about this post. I know there isn't much humor or wit in it but what can I say life is boring.

-Are you happy now Hinda?

I'm Baaaaaack!

So now that I'm back from the holy land I guess it's proper time that I give my lists of the things that I'll miss from Israel as well as my thank yous:

Things I'll miss about Israel:
-The men's only room at Uri's Pizza
-Kedusha between the porno shacks
-Being able to spend 5 shekel more easily then 1 dollar (duty free shop exchange between me and Avishai: me: A buck for a box of must! That's a rip off! Avishai: You've been spending 5 shek on it all year!)
-Shoko b'sakit
-Flushing options
-Big lunch, small supper
-Squishy, Bobo and the kittens
-Never being more then 3 buses from anywhere in the country
-Learning excellent Talmud logic (next Wednesday is in a week!)
-MLB.TV
-Cheap good coffee
-Legal racial profiling (see side rants)
-On second thought: cheap good every food product (except orange juice)
-Being em bayit
-Being able to Bitul and still learn something

Now I'd like to move on to my thank yous from the past year:

-All the various Odess families that over the year have feed and housed me
-All the other families that have also feed and housed me: The Irelands, The Solomonts, The Cutters, Avishai's cousins The Schwarz's and all the families in the Scheinfeld community in Beit Shemesh
-All the guys from the yeshiva for putting up with me
-All my friends from Maimo especially Avishai for keeping me somewhat sane this year
-The Rabbis and their families for teaching me more then just the curriculum and the "educational method" (here have a brochure!)
-Last but not least: Tom! (no reason needed)

Side Rants

-One thing I don't understand: people who clap after a plane lands (this custom is more prevalent on El Al then any other airline). When the trolley pulls up by my house and stops do I clap for the driver? Why applaud the pilot? He has as much of a vested interest in landing safely as I do! I'm reserving the right to boo if I ever get in a plane crash. (These people are probably the same schmucks who clap at the end of a movie)

-I miss the racially profiling security in Israel already. When I had to go through security at JFK for my flight to Boston I was given a more intense security pat down then I ever had this entire year in Israel! It was ridiculous. The only reason I got flagged was because I booked my ticket in Israel which is technically in the Middle East. The guard knew it was ridiculous. I was practical falling asleep while he was patting me down!

-Dani's summer job watch: bubkus

-Yankees game last night: the turning point in the season

Dani Fan Club

It's official, I now have a fan club! It's a blog started by Gila entitled "Inspired by Dani" and you can check it out at http://gilasworld.blogspot.com/. So it looks as if my philosophy on blogging is starting to catch on. Only two months and I already have a fan club. At this pace I'll have 6 fan clubs a year started in my honor. Ok time to come back down to earth now that my ego has been boosted for once...

Side Rants

-I just noticed that blogger.com added a handy dandy spell checker to their website. One question though: Why doesn't it recognize the word blog?

-Coming home on Sunday! (though I might decide to stay here as you stupid Americans decided to acquit Michael Jackson! That and the dollar just went up against the shekel so my money is worth more just in time for me to leave!)

-Dani's summer job watch: Lord help me!

-I just saw the plans for New Yankee Stadium and all I can say is that I'm impressed. After being very much against replacing Yankee Stadium the new one looks awesome. They completely duplicated the way Yankee Stadium looked before the renovations in the 70's. And they are keeping the field, dugouts and facade from the original! Now I just need to make sure to take in as many games as possible in the original before 2009.

-Anyone notice how my side rants are slowly becoming longer then the main rant?

Listen here frenchie!

Last night was our last Wednesday night off of the year at Yesodei HaTorah so to celebrate the bunch of us decided to all go out to eat together. Avishai had a coupon for %10 off at this french restaurant called La Guta that none of us had ever been to before so we decided to check it out, after all the menu on the web said entrees were only 60 shekel. We get there and walk in and I take one look at the place and I say there is no way that entrees are only 60 shekel. The place had all sorts of nice ambiance and when we asked them to bring us regular water they brought us bottled water! Well apparently they mistranslated entree. What they really meant to say was appetizers! Appetizers were 60 shekel! So after about half the group left in search of cheaper eats we settled down to figure out what to get. I ordered an entrecote (rib) steak in garlic, honey, and mustard seed sauce. It was incredible. Quite possibly the best piece of meat I have ever had in my life. It literally melted in your mouth. And it came with a shot glass of root vegetable soup and some rolls with this olive spread which were both also amazing. And it only ran me 72 shek in the end (80 shek-%10). The same steak would have definitely run at least double in the US even in a treif restaurant. So in the end I guess I got my monies worth.

Side Rants

-I've started to compile a list of T.V. shows I need to look up next time I'm at the Museum of Television and Radio in New York. They have a library of every T.V. show ever made! any suggestions? so far I've thought of the pilot episode of "Sesame Street" and "Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego?". You know weird stuff that you'll probably never see anywhere.

-Look at the spine of a Jastrow dictionary. What makes no sense about it? It says A-Z! last I checked Aramaic is listed alef to tof.

-Dani's summer job watch: still nothing.

-I'm coming home in a little more then a week. If you need anything from the holy land let me know.

-I never mentioned this before but our yeshiva has two cats Squishy and Bobo who roam the campus. before pesach squishy gave birth to four kittens and we hadn't really seen them since and assumed they died. Well today two of them surfaced and they are the most adoorable things ever. One is orange the other is gray. (tonny you have to take good care of the four of them!)

Brown Cake

Have you ever noticed that chocolate cake doesn't really taste like chocolate. It's very good but I wouldn't say it's goodness comes from the chocolate. Hence why vanilla cake is often called yellow cake. I feel that chocolate cake should be called brown cake. If I want a pastry that tastes like chocolate I reach for the brownies, not the chocolate cake. If I want a sweet, moist, light, fluffy treat then I go for the brown cake. Does anyone else share this thinking with me?

Side Rants

-I think Yesodei sold or accidentally leaked out our e-mail addresses because everyone here has started getting spam from some "girls" named kelly and morgan. At first we thought that g-mail had sold us all out but then some of the yahoo using guys started getting it too. Weird!

-Karlin please take your foot out of your mouth!

-It was my birthday today: which of my grandmothers ends up waking me up tonight by calling at 3 in the morning to wish me happy birthday?

My goof

Yes I know I made a grammatical mistake in the very post where I was ragging on the Jpost for their lack of editing. I'm sorry. One big difference between me and the Jpost though: they have people called editors who get paid to sit around all day and edit what they publish! I don't have that convenience. Sorry.

Side Rants

-Ed, I read your blog! (See the handy link on the right)

-Dani's summer job watch: Called the guy who I would work for at Lubavitch today. His wife told me I'd have to call back around 7 p.m. EDT (about 2 in the morning here in Israel!) fun fun!